Denying the Duke – For Now


“Dear Duke,” you say, firmly pushing yourself away with delicate hands placed against his broad and muscular chest. “You are an excellent kisser, but I fear that even the most accomplished of love-makers could not make love if his brains were blown out by faithless mercenaries. Arm yourself, I pray.”

“You are so wise!” the Duke exclaims, and snatches up a lumino-epee, slinging it from his narrow hips.

And just in time! You hear an outcry from the corridor, and immediately rush the door, where you discover Caroline Jin Yue and Harmony Sonata much beset by more than a dozen marauding mercenaries!

“Invaders, begone!” Dashington cries, and flourishes his lumino-epee with such effect that he disembowels three mercenaries with a single slash. “Up the Dashingtons!”

You descend upon the mercenaries in a soaring arc, pulling on all the power of your Ferret Leap, crushing two to the floor, while Caroline makes full use of both the projectile and cutting surfaces of her zathwop bladearm to scorch the skin off those who were recently her comrades-in-arms until they so horribly betrayed her!

You glance upon Harmony with concern, but it appears the diva is not less suited to the arts of war than she is to the arts of art! Her perfectly controlled voice is perhaps the deadliest weapon of all, as her devastating vocal attacks, precisely pinpointed upon the eardrums of the attackers, melt their traitorous brains within their very skulls!

Just as things are starting to look grim, librarian Byron Keates arrives, and proves that in addition to his organizational skills, he also possesses a mind so keen that he can use telekinetic powers against attackers, turning the mercenaries’ own weapons upon themselves!

But it is you who ultimately save the day, as, with a perfectly executed Aardvark Hustle, you deliver a double-footed Newt Kick to the chest of the enormous head mercenary. Your heels thrust through his chest, destroying his heart and lungs, and unfortunately soaking your fuzzy slippers in gore.

However, this sartorial disaster is but a small cloud upon your happiness, as you gaze upon the field in triumph!

“O! Marry me!” cries Duke Dashington, falling to his knees in a puddle made up of the pulped internal organs of the enormous mercenary.

“Choose me!” Byron offers, letting a cloud of armaments fall to the floor with a clatter.

“Marry me!” Caroline suggests, shaking droplets of grey matter off her bladearm blade.

“Marry me!” Harmony sings, absentmindedly delivering an axe kick upon a merely mortally wounded foe’s face.

Caroline eyes Harmony and smile roguishly. “Or you could marry both of us?” she smirks.

O! It seems you have found your identity, saved the day, and perhaps found your one true love/s! But which one – or two – shall you choose?

1) You are a princess of the House Royal, and there is a part of you that will always thrill to the ducal ambitions of a Duke! You choose Dashington.

2) The power of the librarian’s intellect is impossible to resist! You choose Byron.

3) Caroline’s ferocity sets quivers through your nether-belly like an earthquake would send quivers through the mantle of the planet, moon, or planetoid upon which it occurs! You choose Caroline.

4) Harmony’s bounteous blue beauty and vivid voice is not to be denied! You choose Harmony.

5) If your parents will be thrilled when you bring one fiancée home, why not two? You choose Caroline and Harmony.

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